The Mill Street Journal

6. Screme Egg

What a strange little fellow this was. For those unaware, this was the Hallowe’en version of the Easter classic. The Screme Egg paints many pictures for me and it’s still so confusing. The first picture it paints for me is that the world will tell you you’re doing too much when you’re doing too much. It also tells me that if you’re not the original you’re going to struggle to win people over. Id take you backer Screme Egg don’t worry you’d have one sale if you returned.

5. Donuttree

Portstewart promenade folklore. This place was deadly. Can’t remember exactly when the Donuttree graced us with her presence but it was definitely before donuts were cool. That was probably the reason it didn’t last, too ahead of its time. Or maybe the owners decided they were going to retire, not sure! Either way It was gutting to young McNaughten that this placed closed its doors. The predecessor to all those other ones, Taboo, Guilt Trip, OH!, Black Box etc. etc. The only gansta I can recall being before Donuttree is of course Dinky Donuts, whatever happened to them…

4. Buckfast

Buckfast makes me laugh so much. Branded as a tonic and produced by monks. The label is excellent though the colours work so well, the drawing of the abbey and those disproportionate grapes beside it. Fantastic.

3. Barney The Dinosaur

I was slightly hesitant to put our Barnabas on this list due to the criminal conviction rumours that spiralled out of control into every playground. However, from my brief research there, it’s all myth so he’s in. I’m sure you can all remember the iconic remix of the theme tune; ‘Barney is a dinosaur in our imagination, stick a pencil (or finger, in some playground dialects) up his ………… constipation.’ Tune.

2. Cadbury Cookie Nut Crunch

Another failed Cadbury experiment. Probably my favourite chocolate bar Cadbury had ever produced but unfortunately the world didn’t agree with me so it got binned, but that other silly little popping candy jelly one is still around. Stop, world!

1. Kandoo

Who remembers wiping their hole with these bad boys? I still do from time-to-time. For me, that frog is up there with Freddo, Crazy Frog and the one who lisped that princess. I’ll probs do a frog tier list soon actually. I think we all have to remember that this is a wipe. A wipe. Name a better branded wipe, Andrex could never. The colours, the frog character, the font. It’s an A* Technology & Design GCSE project.